Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
