please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
