no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
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