Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
