After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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