mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
