it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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