so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
They have beer where we have blood.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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