Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
