sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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