The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
