i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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