She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
