The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
