Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
