I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize