drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I'm really busy with my period
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