My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
