is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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