we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
he shaved USA in his pubs
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize