I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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