You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
