This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize