I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
