Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Less talking, more tequila
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
