sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
