Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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