"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
