We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
