My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Randomize
