New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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