I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
