Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize