is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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