Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
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