I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
