yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
he thought i was a dude.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize