I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
