Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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