If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
