you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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