around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
