I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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