God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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