How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
