I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
