He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
