I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
