Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
