I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize
